Part of Me : Introvert

 

Dear Zach,

Even though I am not working today, I hit right in the sack after blogging before 10 p.m. last night. Partly due to I was having foul mood and not wanting to do anything else better than sleeping the day away.

I woke up to the drowsy morning. I grabbed my phone expecting a message from the guy whom I snapped at last night but there was none. He got angry – that I won’t blame him for being angry at me. I want him to be actually. So that we can stop contacting each other and I can stop thinking about him again. Hopefully he will get my cue on my last night behavior.

I’ve found a part of me this morning. I came to realize that I am an introvert – I should say I finally admit this. Not sure if there’s a range of one to ten in scaling introvert. But I can assure myself I am one of the introversion population out there. The assurance from this articles 10 Ways Introverts Interact Differently With The World had gotten me firmly believed I am one. Not that this article itself has got me proven instantly I am, I have read a few articles about being introvert and I came to believe this.

Here’s the few points from the articles I want emphasize on myself:

1. They withdraw in crowds.

As much as I have told y’all, I really do hate crowds. You may think that’s ironic because few weeks ago I went to the club. Well, that’s because my best friend is the only person I am close with, hence I can drop all the jitters and be myself, at least. Usually, I stay at home and do my own thing.

2. Small talk stresses them out, while deeper conversations make them feel alive.

I avoid small talks by any chance. I always find a way to escape from being initiated small talk when there’s one person standing next to me. If I couldn’t escape, I’d have to nod and smile briefly but inside my heart I would be screaming “please stop talking.” Absolutely avoid acquaintances because of the possibility of engaging in small talk with them. As for the deeper conversations, I don’t have to describe more about that as you know me.

3. They physically can't stand talking on the phone.

Talking on the phone with my mum is way different from talking on the phone with friends or strangers or acquaintance. It’s true that I always feel dreadful to pick up those least favorite numbers appear on the screen of my phone. And I am more nervous in talking through the phone than in person itself.

4. They literally shut down when it's time to be alone

Yes. Whenever I am in deep thought in whatever place, I’d literally stop interacting. People always ask me if I am okay. I said that I was fine, but they don’t believe me. I become very quiet and they would be very cautiously to talk to or touch me as though I was a time bomb that I would explode in the brief of touch.

 

There are more points in different articles but these are the points I’d want to talk about.

I want to quote from this commentator,

“The greatest blessing of being an introvert would have to be never really feeling bored when alone.”.

Indeed. 

I am an introvert.