Dear Zach,
I looked into the mirror, seeing myself in the reflection, I uttered one word: Why?
Why do I have to pretend someone that I am not when I can be someone that I want to be?
Why had great things never ever happened to me?
Why do I have to be so kind blessing someone I care about when I knew he’s with someone else?
I wanted to throw my fist to the mirror as if hitting myself back. Is it what it is? Am I incapable of loving? What do I know about heartbreaking when I am incapable of loving?
The void in my heart is prickling each time I remind myself that.
Closing the door shut, and clamber into my bed holding close to myself, and holding back my tears and swallow the lump in my throat, telling myself “I am closing myself up. No emotions. No love. It’s heartbreaking even though I can’t afford to love.”
Life is not fair but it does have its beauty intermingled with all the pain. The key is to learn and adapt. Become a better and stronger person from it all. As of the question "Why". In the long run it does not matter.
ReplyDeleteEasier said than done. I hope I can try harder to learn and adapt.
DeleteJust tell yourself it's not the time. Work hard for your future first, then wait for it.
ReplyDeleteIf its all about the pleasure, well, find ways to satisfy yourself one way or another?
Indeed, I am going to disregard whatever pleasure that got into me and focus in my career.
DeleteLife is have a lot of stone to make you fall.
ReplyDeleteBut you can't just because you fall and don't wake up.
Life must going on.
(Big hug..)
Gambateh la..