I Will Cheat

Dear Zach,

"Will you cheat if you ever have a boyfriend?"

The answer is ... Yes. I will. 

It doesn't take long enough for me to think about it. It's pretty obvious - I don't believe in monogamy. Not anymore at least. I read stories about monogamous relationship. It started off usually fine; all about love and shit, sex's great, talking about dream and being together forever. The fallout most commonly happens after 6 months; bickering, shouting match, fighting over nothing, sex greatly reduced to almost none, estranged from each other, eventually one of them start snooping around with other men. It's a vicious cycle. 

I used to believe in love. Head over heels in love. However, over the past years, my faith in it has gradually lost. Most men I've hooked up with cheated on their partner with me. With me. I felt like shit for knowing the truth. That didn't bother me for long enough. Not that I was gonna repent for my sin. From that, I know. Men are full of shit. Men have sexual need that have to be fulfilled, not from one source but as many as possible. Let's take my fuck buddies for instance, we used to have sex every weekend. As the month went by, sex was less frequent. When I texted them, they always have a fucking excuse to turn you down. Once is enough, twice is too much, third time I completely removed them from my contact list forever. I don't need them anymore. Even my fuck buddies eventually got tired of me, how can I expect something being different from a man if we were in a relationship? 

Yes. I will cheat. I won't get my heart broken over a man who cheat on me. 

HookUp Marathon

Dear Zach,

On Wednesday, I went to the usual swimming pool to have a tan on my skin. But dark cloud descended, ready to get wet with us. So I decided to dip into pool. There came a guy with a good frame of body, most importantly, he's tan as fuck, wearing skimpy trunk, obviously to look for a hunt. Fast forward to later, we were in one of the shower room, making out, ass grabbing, and cock-sucking. He has a nice ass and is a bottom. The tan line of his turned me on so bad. He seemed too eager to get fucked, he squirted some body shampoo and applied to his anus, and turned around, ass facing my hard-on, eager to plunge it in. I stop him before it's too late. Sex 101  - No Bareback. I embraced him from behind, my left hand on his nipple, right hand stroking his cock, and made out with him in this doggy position. We both came afterward. He slipped to the next door to clean himself up. When I grabbed my bag and ready to leave, I saw him showering with open door, I moved in and grabbed his ass, and smooched him one last time. 

Today, I had to teach a swimming lesson to one of my learners. So I went to the pool again. And this mid-40s guy chatted me up in the pool while I was waiting my learner to come. We did give each other nods in the past, but we never really talked. He was in his skimpy trunk, slim and toned, visible abs, and most importantly, he's tan as fuck. He looks sexy at his age. We talked in the pool; I was hard as fuck. After I finished teaching, I went in the shower room, and saw him lathering himself in the open shower. I joined in beside him. He flashed me his cock, pretending to wash his scrotum, and I was rock hard. There was another guy joined in, whom I hooked up with two weeks ago at the same place same time, and of course he's tan. I wasn't in the mood for three some. So I moved to a slightly secluded cubicle and shower with open door. Fast forward to later, the guy of my interest and I made out intensely - boyy this guy is horny as fuck. He almost tear off my lips. We suck, made out, suck, and made out. He wanted to fuck me there and now. But I declined. Sex 101 - No bareback. Soon, he bob my head while I was sucking his cock, sensing he's gonna cum, as if on cue, I drew out, and he cum at my mouth with thick load. Jaysus! This guy must be as dry as nun's crotch. 

I feel like I'm a slut.  

Blowjob

Dear Zach,

I'm not really sure why I have been extremely horny these days. Maybe it is a celebratory getting a job finally. I know I would be terribly busy once I start my new job next week, so I make up all the sex as much as possible this week, as a reward of finally getting a job. Yesterday I gave a buff Malay guy blow job. He was so happened to be at the petrol station right opposite of my housing area when I switched on Grindr. He responded quickly and eager to get down dirty. So I drove there, he was waiting outside of the restroom as the surrounding is relatively quiet. He was much shorter than I expected. But he's a set of nice tits. I followed him inside the toilet to one of the cubicle, we got down to business. I sucked his curvy cock for good 20 minutes and he came. I didn't want to cum. So I left to my car and texted him thanks.  

New Hookup Site: Instagram

Dear Zach,

Instagram has been becoming my second hookup apps by far. I wouldn't say that I got to hookup with everyone I met there by liking their pictures, leaving flirtatious comment, and eventually personal messaging them to see how thing goes. I like their pictures mostly; I leave comment occasionally; I personal message them if necessary. Out of 10 guys, I've got to hook up with one - he's a bottom. And that was so last year. Instagram is transparent - you can't hide your face in your pictures unless you don't intend to show. Apparently, my instagram feeds are filled with semi-naked guys across the globe which has become a trend for the past years. And I got a lot of messages from guys originally from Singapore. I think all the guys who personal message me are from Singapore. I'm not sure why they aim at me as Singapore is famous with hunks and muscles they can easily find there. So the conversation mostly started off with casual how-are-you, within short minute of time, it escalated quickly into cock-pic trading session, saying 'how i wish i could fuck your ass now', eventually becoming a jerk-off-video trading session, by looking at the motion of handstroking our cock in video itself as though it would let our steam off. In the end, they replied that they cummed and I lied to them that I did to. They keep asking me to come visiting Singapore. 'It will be fun.' They said. I highly believe it was all the dick talking as they can't wait to fuck me there. And I don't intend to go there at all. In fact, I hate going there. It's such a shame that I tend to attract more Singaporean man rather than the local people here. Below are some guys I sext with recently. 

Add caption

Tanned Line (NSFW)

Dear Zach,

I was all alone in my home as my parents went out for shopping. As I knew, there would be a few hours to spare before they came back. I caught up with flu and was horny as fuck. And my subconscious wouldn't allow me to let those few hours to go to waste. So I tapped on Jack'd for a hookup. And I got lucky enough to invite a guy whom I was chatting with for sex over the past few months. He stays not far from my location. 20 minutes later, he was at my front door, greeting me with his tall, slim, brown tanned skin figure. He looks absolutely yummy. And, being the naughty side of me, I wore my pant so low til my butt crack shown to greet him at the door. While leading him to my room, he slipped his hand around my waist from behind, and kiss me on the back of my neck. We exchanged a few pleasantries, then he stripped down naked in front of me and went to the bathroom and took a shower. 5 minutes later, he climbed on my bed with his yummy tanned body. His prominent tanned line across his crotch and ass is what turned me on the most. 

"You are very tan and I like it." I can't help but to comment. 

"You are not so bad for yourself." He said mischievously. 

We had taken up 30 minutes for foreplay. We both have a dick of same length and girth, and enjoyed playing with each other's dick. He slided his condom-coated dick into my anus in a pain-free motion. In the middle of fornication, I suggested to record down our sex. Surprisingly, he agreed to it and was very much keen in doing so. Swiftly, he took his phone and started recording. We took turn to record.

It was exhilarating. We fucked for almost two hours. He came in my mouth and I swallow it. He's one of the few guys I willing to swallow. I don't know why. I just did. It tasted good. We laid on my bed for a short while after we cleaned ourselves up. Seeing him half naked from waist up laying there, I can't help to play his nipple. I wanted to have the second time sex with him. But I was too tired to ask as my flu was getting at me. 

feel so good and right. 

Thought of uploading a video. I guess better not. 

xx

I Do

Dear Zach,

Happy smiles were flashing everywhere with anticipation. Everyone was busy snapping photos of the bride and groom. Being the center of attention for the first time in their life, they were the happiest people on earth. They couldn't have been more happier than finding the right person to share the rest of their life with, til death do them apart. I was looking at the wedding bands where my brother put aside of the table - shinning with platinum white gold on the top of the bands - not the typical golden wedding rings dated back to olden days. It's affordable, classy, and sophisticated. It has a lot to say about my brother and future sister-in-law. Their contented smiles were so infectious I can't help to curve my lips a little. Not long after, we were ushered into a small room, which has a desk at the center, and fake-roses-decorated arch far behind of the room. Fortunately, the room was able to fit in both sides of family, which is 17 against 4 of us. The officer, who officiated the registration of marriage, jokingly ask my brother if he's ready or need a moment to re-think in the next room. We laughed. The wedding vows went through rather quickly, as though they were eager to get this thing done. It was not the typical on-screen-romantic vow exchange because they certainly know what they want. It was kinda boring actually. Once they were done, we were allowed to take pictures for 5 minutes. The couple was standing underneath the arch ready to be shot. It was a rather small and cozy ceremony. But everyone is happy with it. I wonder if someday I would have got the chance at all to get married with a guy I love.   

xx

Live Boldly

Dear Zach,

Yesterday is history; Tomorrow is mystery; Today is a gift - that's why we called it present. Sometimes we tend to get worried too much to forget to live.

Live boldly.

xx

Too Late Not To Say Sorry

Dear Zach,

Four years ago, when I first started my freshmen year in college, I constantly envisioned myself doing something great in 5 years time; be somebody, stood out, and making plans for the following next 5 years to come. I would be travelling in South East Asia for every 2 months, affording a car of my own, and having high-flying career that make enough living. Or best of all, having a smokin' hot boyfriend who fell head over heels in love with me. 

Fast forward to four years later, I can't help but to feel sorry for myself. 

 

23

Dear Zach,

The sky was grey as if reflecting my current mood: empty. I woke up to the realization that I was jobless, probably unuseful, and anti-social. I felt restless, uneasy, and aggravated with the thought of sitting at home again. I refuse to go out today because my budget is running tight. Plus I have nowhere to go to. I laid on my bed, in deep contemplation, probably being a dead corp lying on bed waiting to be buried - that's what my dad said. I waited for phone call for job offered: No news. It made me even more restless I wanted to punch the cats sitting at the back of the garden. I searched through jobstreet to apply for job. One thing that I am absolutely sure that I am clueless where I am headed. Clueless about my goal. Clueless about my need. I wanted to travel to find a bit of part of me. But my bank account statement says no - I can't even afford to book a 3 star hotel, let alone to buy the flight ticket. Pathetically enough, I missed the straight guy I had sex with. I'm not sure why. I just missed him. I think my birthday gets worst by each year itself. There goes my birthday today. 

That Time I Had Sex With A Curious Straight Guy

Dear Zach,

He was tall. Pale. Cute and fairly handsome. He was nice to look at but not enough to get my head turn. I didn't bother until he tail-gated me behind my car with his expensive looking car after I left the swimming complex. 

We hang out at the railing of the bus stop. He bought me soda drink from 7/11. It was rather awkward as he was kinda of nervous about it. I wanted to know why. We exchanged a few niceties. Then he asked. 

"So ... do you have girlfriend?" 

" No." I shoke my head. 

"Boyfriend?" 

"No." 

"Gay?" 

"Yup." I curved up my smile and look at him. 

"You are gay?" He seemed surprised. Then the penny dropped.

"Are you bisexual?" I asked. 

"Well, kind of ... I'm not sure. I'm confused actually." His face was unreadable. 

"Do you have girlfriend before?" 

"Ya. Two. It was long time ago."

"Boyfriend?" 

"No." 

"Ever have any sexual encounter with guys?"

"Well, once. I was drunk at that time. And he brought me to hotel and we just did some handjobs and blowjobs." His cheeks was pink. 

"Are you shy?" I looked at him.

"Ya.. I'm nervous actually. This is my first time, sitting down here, talking to a gay guy like this." 

"Well, don't be. I'm not gonna rape you or something. And I have the strong feeling that you were a highly homophobic person beforehand."

He didn't say anything. He didn't have to. I knew. 

"Well, I don't really care if you homophobic or whatsoever. I can't change your mindset. It's all down to whether or not you want to be that way." 

"I don't think I am anymore. Since I am kinda attracted to some guys. Like you."

A moment passed. I can't help but to ask. 

 "Why were you following me behind my car?" 

" No. I didn't. I happened to be around here." He poker-faced. 

"You are lying. The moment when you keep staring at me in the pool. I knew it. And I saw you keep making rounds in the car park as if waiting for me. I know that trick, Joe. I do. I have been gay for years and that was a hookup trick."

He broke into smile as if I revealed his dirty little secret. He's very cute. 

"Oh you! Since you knew. Then you don't have to say it out loud." He shove me lightly. He was blushing. 

Our conversation settled into silence. He looked uncomfortable. 

"So bi-curious guy, what do you want to do now?"

"Let's have sex." He said without blinking his eyes.

"Ya, right? The hotel is just right next to it in front of us." I chuckles. 

He eyes were staring at me as if to will me to look at him. I looked at him. 

"omg! you can't be serious right?! Are you serious? Are you even ready to have sex with a guy yet? I was in shocked.

"Ya. I am ready. I want to try. Let's get to the hotel." He got up and started to walk toward the hotel. 

"Wait up! Fuck! You seriously doing this? Are you sure?" My heart was thumbing so hard right now.

"Ya. You go get the lube and condoms. Here's the note." He handed me a RM50 note. "And I go get the room now." He walked off to the hotel. 

Five minutes later, we met outside of the hotel. 

"If you want to walk away from me and bid goodbye you can do it now, you know."

"I've already got the room key." He was smiling mischievously. "Let's do it."

It happened quite fast I couldn't absorb everything. We were stripping our clothes off hastily. He pushed me down to the bed and sealed his lips with mine. So hungrily and eagerly. His mouth was all over my body. Hot and wet. And he has a skilled tongue. And I loved it. 

"You have watched a lot of gay porn, haven't you?" I asked while he was blowing me. 

He looked up and said, "I've fucked a lot of girls. But this is my first time sucking a dick." 

And then he slid the condom on his hard-on and plunge into my hole. Boyyy.. he was so skilled the moment he undulated his body. As if he has done this too many times. He flipped me back and forth and fucked me rough, fast and hard. He liked it hard. And I loved it. 

When I was on top of him, I can't help to smile and ask him, "So, are you gay now? Or completely bisexual?" 

"Oh! Shut it!" He flipped me over on my back and he fucked me hard. I wondered how horned up he had been. 

"I'm gonna cum soon." 

After a good ol' half hour of banging hard on my ass, he cum all over my body. 

"Fuck." He was grasping for air. He looked at me as I was covered with his semen. "Let's get you washed up." 

We didn't talk much after that. When we left the hotel, we were both stood by our cars. 

"So..." I said, trying to find something to say. 

"So ... I'm gonna head home." He said, as if wanting to say more of it.

"Yeah.. that's cool." I can't help but feeling a bit disappointed. 

"Yeah.. alright." He held up his hands. "See you." 

I held it. "Ya, see you." 

We both didn't want to leave. I wanted to ask for his number. But I thought that was too silly to ask. This guy just wanted sex from me. No string attached sex. Here it is. Deed is done. Say goodbye. 

I waited for him to ask for my number instead. 

"So.. I gotta go." He looked at me warily. 

"Ya.. me too. It's been a rough night." I realized that he just another bloke in town just wanted sex. Why do I care so much? It's not big deal that he didn't ask for my number. 

"Alright, see you." He got into his car, ignited his engine, and pulled out of the parking lot. He waved at me and gave me a horn before he drifted away. 

"Goodnight, Joe." I utter under my breath as I looked at his car, disappeared at the round of corner.