What Type of Men Do I Like ? (in my 30s)

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Bald Forever

Dear Zach,

It has been almost 2 years now since I decided to shave all my hair and go bald. I feel liberated with the decision I made because I have saved up a lot of costs without going to barber and buying any kind of expensive hair growth shampoo for my crown thinning hair loss. All I need, now, is a shaver and shaving cream, maintaining the clean shaven bald look for every 2 or 3 days a week.

I do look like a brand new person going bald in the beginning. It takes a lot of getting used to for people. It is as though I went through a mental breakdown and respair to a new persona. Back then, I was still pretty lean and it made my head looked small going bald. Therefore, I work extremely hard in the gym to bulk up to compensate the difference. Now, I am pretty satisfied how I look. Bald really does suit me. I no longer care about how people look at me in a way I expect them to be. I am bald and love how it make me feels. Being bald makes me look extremely heterosexual. The gays, either in the sauna or at the cruise park, are surprised by my manly "straight" outlook, who turns out to be a total bottom who love offering his white smooth juicy ass for anal penetration. The guys in the sauna love me because they hardly encounter a masculine bottom who has muscle and other bottom they meet are either skinny or fat or feminine skinny or just super fat.

Being a bottom has been decided since ages ago. But being bald and bottom has never even crossed my mind. I was even afraid going bald could lose all my sexual appeals. In fact, it didn't. It blossoms.

If you ask me, will I ever go back growing my hair if I am given a chance to go through treatment?

Probably not. I would likely go bald for as long as I live.   

It Finally Shows

Dear Zach,

"Are you headed for competition?" the cute indian guy at the Sundry shop asked while handing me the change.

I was perplexed. "Or you just enjoyed lifting weight at the gym?" He nodded at my body. The penny dropped.

"oh no. I just like lifting weight." I chuckled at his comment but deep down inside I was giddy at his indirect compliment. Especially coming from him.

I have been buying bananas and limes from this Sundry shop since forever. This cute indian helper always at the till and love giving me a few cents off from the bill. He has been seeing my physical changes over the years. For the past 6 months, I have been focusing training a little bit too much on my chest and shoulders, now it finally shows.

A random compliment from a cute stranger to my progress does make my day! 

I needed the poundage

Dear Zach,

TIF texted me out of the blue in Tuesday morning telling me he was back in the area from Penang for a day. I told him we were meeting at night 10.30pm.

He has gotten tanner than the last time I met him in March, but still lean and tall. When we were in my room, we stripped naked and hugged for the longest time. I guess we both missed each other a bit too much.

The sex was as great as I could remember. I sprawled in four with my ass perking up and head muffled in the sheet, he did his usual best to pound away my frustration against the agency and about my salary issue. He pounded me so hard and fast against my butt cheeks I muffled my moan so hard in the sheet.

When he was about to cum, I kneeled down and sealed his dick head in my mouth, quenching my thirst, swallowing every drop of his cum essence down my throat. Tasted like cigarettes. He was surprised by my act. I told him I missed him so much that's why I drank his cum.

I really needed that poundage after having a frustrated start of the week.      

fucking luck

Dear Zach,

It is and has always been part of my DNA that the "good luck" has and never will be in my favor. Ever.

7th of the month is the payday. I am anticipating the salary deposit kachiingg sound from my phone. Somehow, it is deposited earlier than expected but I am crestfallen by looking at the amount in my bank account. I am missing huge chuck of my commission from the delivered parcel counts I did for last month.

I am totally upset and feeling like fool who get scammed by the agency for telling me that they deduct the threshold parcel count for the days I work for, the remaining left are my commission. Therefore, with the combination of the basic salary and the remaining amount of commission they left for me, all those 10k steps walking from house to house, stairs to stairs, lot to lot, underneath the hot and hazy weather, end up I barely even get RM2000. My hub leader is shocked hearing from me. Since we are under different agencies, she can't do anything about it. All she can do to help is to convert me to part-time contract, in which it could earn almost or could be more than what I earn now. Whatever it is, I agree and let her to assist me in this matter.

   

Victim or Volunteer?

Dear Zach,

Those who love watching gay porn, you must have known about Austin Wolf - the fan favorite gay porn star in the internet for his beefy physique and macho sex persona. Back in the days when I was on X, most of his sex clips kept resharing on my feeds by other users. There were plenty of his amateur (non studio produced) videos showing him getting blown in the gym sauna, fucking in the shower, or fucking in public toilet cubicle. Not gonna deny the fact that his presence oozing sex vibe to the surrounding, the gays would find it hard to resist hooking up with him knowing what he did for living.

Most of his encounters were youngster - skinny, smooth, twink. Only his studio-produced videos were with man of his size or slightly younger. But if you were to check out his home made videos, most of them were with boys barely 18. There were videos of him like force-shoving his dick down this teenage kid's throat in the garage, fucking him while the phone was put afar at the side recording the whole scene. 

Guess what? Most of these younglings enjoyed being bred by him as much as the man himself doing the deed on them. You can tell obviously they were more than willing to throw themselves to him rather than being the victim themselves. There was a video, I particularly remember because, where the twink bottom was literally sprawling offering his ass up and smiling with satisfaction while the man himself pounding raw behind him with cameras recording situated in four different angles, and one camera strapped on his forehead as first person view. "Mannn, this guy takes home-made video very seriously." I thought.

Last year, he was sentenced to jail for you-know-what. Interestingly, if these younglings agreed and willing to offer themselves to him, in this case, shouldn't the younglings should get jailed too?

Personally, I never find him remotely attractive. I am more interested as to why the same law doesn't apply to the youngsters who did the deed with him.

Believing can be deceiving

Dear Zach,

In related to previous post about the addiction of social media, most of the contents posted are intentional for seeking validation. Since my feeds are mostly gym and shirtless men, therefore I am fed with plenty of unnaturally muscular guys in their early 20s, proudly showing off their "hardwork", stripping down to their underwear, seeking fans, likes and thirsty comments.

I come across a video about the dark side of steroid usage amongst the teens and guy in their early twenties, they are largely influenced by the pressure of looking good (vascular/shredded/dreambody) on the internet. Not to mention that you can easily purchase a few vials of PED from the dealer or online. This happens a lot to the youngster in India, where they chase for overnight fame by having dream body, so that they can be on stage competing, getting sponsors, to have a better way out of being poor.

As far as I know, being an influencer is not a job. Most of these influencers, in real life, they are as poor as us. They may be rich in having large followers, but not rich in bank accounts.

Not sure why I am into this topic. Probably it gives me a reason to fall back from scrolling on fb reels and focus on my life.

Reeling Out

Dear Zach,

Sometimes I wonder, with all kinds of existing social media, is it even worth posting a part of yourself or your life or your opinion online just to get validated? The netizen can be extremely toxic and entitled just because they are progressively moving forward with their the trends and agenda, from being able to share your thoughts of some latest issue turned out being accused of being racist, just because they said so - gay forum is the most toxic place ever existed to be honest. A lot of influencers love sharing what they eat or they do in a day, and their unsolicited opinion about themselves, anything but useful info. Sometimes I have the urge to leave a unsolicited comment on their post saying "Who gives a fuck?" in which I certainly am if I do that. 

I have moved away from most of the popular social media apps. The only one that keep me posted with the latest news and info is Facebook from my laptop. If FB were to be installed in my phone, I would definitely be absentmindedly scrolling away. Somehow, I can't help but to constantly hover the cursor over "Reels" tab, bombarding me with endless of sexy shirtless indian brown man "Desi Man" flexing or stripping in front of me, those thick and hairy chest and brown torso, the algorithm knows what I like and keeps feeding me with desi man clips, making me feeling hot and heavy all the time, which all the more reinforces my strong sexual appeal toward indian men.

Somehow this needs to stop. As in being addicted to "reels" generally. I am still finding ways to detach from FB as much as I could. But I am constantly tired from work. So just fuck it. 

Sexually Demanding Work

Dear Zach,

For the past two weeks, I have been very occupied with my new job, and I was always tired. Although the job is physically demanding, I managed to accustom with it. There were days that are unpleasantly long; There were also days that are surprisingly short.

My libido somehow has not fallen short in relative to my demanding work. In fact, it exacerbated my sex drive. Last Tuesday, I finished my work earlier than usual, I went to Chakran eager to get fucked. And I did get fucked. Greatly. Raw. From the steambath to the open shower. I was so ecstatic because it has been so long since I last getting bred by an indian bear. We had an amazing sex session. He wanted to exchange number. But I politely declined. Also, I managed to suck off 7 inches big cock by an indian daddy in the steambath. That night ended all well for me. A load in my ass and another one in stomach.

Last night, I went to cruise at Dead Hill again. I didn't expect much. Since I've had a rested sleep the night before, I thought of giving it a go to that place. Half an hour into cruising the hill, I managed to hook up with a stocky malay. Amazing kisser and sucker. He fucked me behind an empty hut, me bending over the railing letting him using my hole, while I enjoyed the dark scenic forest view in front of me.

Once we were done, we parted ways and I tried to look for another encounter. But it started drizzling, I went to the hut by the lake to rest. A chinese guy came by and approached me. I gave him a blowjob. Then, another fellow saw us, came by, and joined us. He took over my place and sucked the chinese guy. Then another and another joined us. Then there was this skinny guy and me getting left out. But I managed to suck a smooth 6 inches dick by him. I thought he was a chinese. He told me he is a Malay. His smooth dick makes all the senses now. I asked him if he wanted to fuck me. He agreed and I pulled him aside, a few feet away from the crowd, and did the deed behind the hut. The chinese guy seemed to have finished off. He saw us fucking by the wall, he came over wanting to join us. Somehow he sensed he wasn't quite welcoming, he left. The malay guy pulled out and took off the condom, telling me he was about to cum. We cum together hard. Once we were done cleaning up, I kissed him for the good fuck and left with pure satisfaction. Although I am, still, not a fan of malay guys, I find that malay guys are more than willing to fuck an ass. I can't be picky enough since my main intention to cruise is to get dicked down in my ass. That's all.    

  

Trio-bj

Dear Zach,

Although my new line of work has been extremely physical tiring, some days I finished off earlier by 5 pm and went home. Few days ago, after I've had my dinner, I decided to give another chance going to Dead Hill to cruise. Since it was weekday, I guess there would be a handful of guys cruising around. And security would unlikely patrol the hill.

When I arrived the entrance of the park, a new fence was up with a big iron gate. It was unlocked and left ajar. Then, I saw a notice attached on the gate, telling the passerby to be cautious of construction works going on. Rumor has it that the hill gonna be demolished and will be developed into some estate.

I walked around in the dark up to the hill top. Only a few hanging around. I walked down the hill to the tombstone area just to rest because I was really tired from walking all day during my work. Later, I managed to hook up with two guys at once having a trio blowjob in open view at some corner. Two of them were good-looking. One chinese and one mix (ind/malay?). They both came but I did not. Before they both left, they asked if I was new coming to this hill since they never saw me before.

I spent a few moment hanging around making out with the chinese guy by the stairs where the cruisers walking up and down and watching us.

I kissed him good bye and left.  

Working Full Time

Dear Zach,

Right after my last post, I tried applying for full time courier for SPX on their official website. I also tried a few ways such as courier hiring ads on FB to send in my application. But my main choice is SPX, of course, as Shopee is the leading online shopping platform in SEA. I did not have much hope getting a reply because they usually ignore or reject or taking us for a joyride having us to fill in application.

The next day my application was approved and I was given a ID right after. The best part was that I was assigned to my preferred hub nearest to my home - like 5 minutes away.  All things happened so fast that I was required to check in with the supervisor on Thursday afternoon and started to work on Friday.

I arrived slightly earlier just to check out how the scanning apps run and so on. Then this stocky malay - one of the supervisor - told me to scan a code on his device to get the list of the parcels, and led me to the cage of parcels. No tutorial given. No advice given. I was expected to read the courier onboarding slides which I was emailed with a day before I report to work. And thankfully, I did. I carefully sorted out the parcels according to the area. I was a mess. I was frantic and no one seemed to convenient to help as other couriers were busy sorting their own business. And I was the only chinese there. Others all malays. Can't complain much because I was there to work. 

Since those assigned parcels were to delivered to areas less than 5 km away, I was pretty sure I was familiar with those places. Boy was I wrong! What I didn't expect was that walking up the flight of stairs of those ultra-low cost apartment was physically demanding. On my first day, I was confused by the signage, frantically searching for correct unit number of the super confusing apartment layout - probably the stupidest layout ever existed. Walking up the flight of stairs was a workout itself. Not to mention the extra steps walking from one unit to another, smelling like urine and cat shits. On my first day of work, I have walked 10K steps in just only 5 hours!

I finished delivering by 6 pm. I was all sweaty and slimy and exhausted. This is really a physical-demanding job and, no wonder, most of the couriers are lean and skinny all because of the work nature itself.

Nothing is Fare

Dear Zach,

I have been working as lalamove delivery driver for 6 months now. I am not ashamed to say I really like the job scope itself. Apart from greeting the fellow people at the pick-up and drop-off points, and dealing some shitty people, there is nothing much to be stressful about working the gig. I enjoy the silence of my job throughout the journey from one point to another. But in my head I always planning the en route to save time and effort to earn the most in the least amount of time. 4 hours passes by very easily by just working like that.

Having said that, the fare is getting lower by each month. I can tell by the statistic of the total amount of jobs completed in each month, growing from 50+ jobs per month to almost 120+ jobs per month but earning literally the same amount of wages. The math doesn't make any sense at all. I am earning the same as I was during my starting month on Feb but working twice amount the workloads. The fare for most of the jobs are dropping from RM20 at least to RM12 for 20km travelling distance. How is this even fair? How is this even allowed? How can you even justify this?

Everyday when I get ready for work, when I scroll down the list of jobs on the app, I get very frustrated looking at the fare. Even the price for a blowjob I used to charged was much higher than all of these. 

I am looking at other platforms for full time delivery job. Since I like the job scope itself, I think it is time to be full time delivery driver with workers benefits and incentives. I am looking at Shopee Express now. Sadly the hub, which is 5 minutes away from my home, is full. I would have to wait then.

 

Almost Get Caught

Dear Zach,

This is my 3rd night cruising at Dead Hills tonight. Last Sunday night was euphoric. Managed to get fucked by the lake side and at a secluded hut twice by a hot daddy.

I went again on Thursday night. Not much of luck but a few blowjobs but I rejected them halfway sucking them or them sucking me when I found out they are malay. I've had bad day on that day itself after dealing with a fucking fat malay security during delivery drop off. Then my rating of delivery service dropped after that. I despised Malay that night itself. They were surprised because we were having a great time before I asked about their race, but I don't care.

Tonight I go again hoping there would be more people of my liking. One hour cruising around the hilltop, I find no luck. Most of them are malay, again. I sit on the concrete top resting. Suddenly, there is this skinny guy rushes over me and told me to leave now because there is a motorbike coming up with high beams, flashing across the darkness. The malay rider, I assume he is a patrol security or some sort, sees quite number of us, and chases us away and telling us to leave as the park is "closed". I power walk down the hill with others as quick as possible before he catches on us. 

When we walk down the second hilltop, I see quite a number of guys running out from the other side toward the exit stairs. I join in and run down the stairs, afraid there would be cops chasing after us. I walk out of the park praying in my heart there is no police car awaiting for us.

I start my car and drive away from that place quickly.

Now I am back to square one, going to Chakran sauna is my only option now. By the way, Dead Hill is full of malays cruising after my 3 days observation. Since my hate toward this race has been reinforced, and this incident happens, I ain't going back to this place again.

Cruising in Dead Hill : Exploration

Dear Zach,

Ever since all the gay meeting apps have been banned in Malaysia, the only way for all the gay people to meet up (for sexual fun), apart from going to gay sauna, is through cruising in the public spaces such as toilet mall, recreational parks, and swimming pool shower room. We are like going back to olden days where cruising in public area is our primary source of seeking prospects.

I have been toying the idea in cruising but these days there are always news about 2 men getting caught having indecent, or immoral, action in public area. I am torn between "fuck it, let's do it" and "let's scale down and think about it".

I have been a member of a gay local forum for quite some time now. There are a lot of topics about cruising for gay people in our local areas, especially at the downtown in one of the few popular malls. Also, some of the notorious swimming pool where actions in the shower room are guaranteed. And then here comes the recreational parks.

I stumbled upon a member commenting about this abandoned recreational forest park in the mid downtown, where it is located probably 20 minutes away from my home. I did not know this place existed although I have passed by the roadway multiple times for the past few months.

I called it Dead Hill because it is abandoned and I strictly want to protect its identity for security reason. Dead Hill was once a popular recreational park, as the year went on, the maintenance of the park slowly disimproved, eventually, the park was abandoned and "opened" for gay people to cruise inside. Now that I have read the archives of the park in the forum, it has become a popular spot for gay cruise since 10 years ago.

Interesting to know that many people in forum commented that the place is great to cruise because it is too dark to see. I have been daunting to go check it out but I was too chickened out to go at night.

Yesterday morning, since I was on the way to visit the temple, I decided to drop by that place and check it out.

I arrived at the parking spot around 10.30 am. There were only few cars parking along the street toward the entrance of the park. I got down and walked through the entrance of the park, where the tall trees hovering over the concrete walkway, and a grimed-covered resting hut along side into the park. A few meters walk inside, I was greeted with a green water lake in the center of the park, the pedestrian walkway is surrounding the lakeside, and I saw a few guys strictly brisk walking around the lake for none other than recreational purpose.

Since I was here, I explored every inch of the park for better navigation at night next time. The park is clearly abandoned with the signs of desolation and overgrown natural beauty, featuring cracked concrete paths, thick vines curl crawling over the grimmed-covered resting huts. As I climbed up to the hill, where the most cruisers loitering around, there were ruined concretes that highlighting its nostalgic traces of its once glory moment. As I climbed up the stairs to the top of the hill, I can see an oversight of the train and highways next to it. Since it was morning, there was no people cruising around here.

Somehow, at the corner of my eyes, I caught a glimpse of a shirtless chinese man loitering at the resting hut, far end of the center of the overlook, I took my sweet time walked over. He was already stripped down to his skimpy thong. An obvious prospect waiting for hunt. I went over and grabbed his crotch, he grabbed mine. Within minutes, he was down on his knee sucking my dick. I cum in his mouth rather quickly because I was afraid of getting caught in plain sight, also he sucked my dick so good like he hasn't sucked one in years. I thanked him and continued my exploration down the hill. Then, I saw another shirtless skinny tanned tattooed guy looking at his phone at the corner of the ruined concrete, another obvious cruiser awaiting. The chance was ruined when a hetero malay couple passed us by. Since it was getting hot anyway, I left the place after 30 minutes exploring.

But I came back in the evening again.

To be cont.... ...

         

1st Death Anniversary

Dear Mum,

Today is your first death anniversary. Not a day goes by that I do not think of you. Everyday whenever I come back from long day of delivery work, your smiling portrait in frame on the cabinet that placed next to the entrance always warmly welcomes me back.

There are days I think of you sitting in the dining table, hunching your back trying to loop the thread in the needle on the sewing machine, only to call for my help to do it for you because of your bad eyesight. I can't afford to give away the sewing machine because it reminds me a lot of us - of how we both trying to make the best use of it.

You loved cleaning the surface of the cabinet, shelves, and table because that was your motherly duty. Cleaning every corner just so we live comfortably. We still try our best to keep our house clean and tidy, just so that we do not want to fail you for not taking care the home you loved.

I am doing fine. Have a job. Eat and sleep well.

I'll visit you at the temple this Sunday.

Miss you. Always.

Love,

Your Son 

Right Place, Right Time, and Right Person.

Dear Zach,

I was the sluttiest and fan-favorite bottom amongst the group of migrant workers. When one of them has fucked me, he would passed my contact (or me) around to his other peers and tell them there is a white smooth bottom for their sexual pleasure. Of course, I would never turn them down unless some of them were really illiterate I gave up texting. Some of them were nice; Some of them were just plain rude. Somehow most of these migrants workers I've fucked with were just one or two time things. Whenever I received a simple text "hi" from a random number by the surname of "Khan", I knew my contact has fallen on some random pakistanis man. 

As my contact number were passed along in the sea of them, it fell on this Pakistanis young guy. He did text me a few times, but I ignored it completely at that time because I was mentally exhausted dealing with them. Towards the end of 2024, he texted me again to try his luck I guess. So I decided to play along with him. He sent an expire photo of himself - he is good-looking. We decided to meet up at his place where he lives in a rented room of the most run-down apartment across the street which was only 5 minutes away from my home. 

Krim is very good-looking in person, slightly taller than me, lean average physique, and packing with 6.5 inches smooth dick. He is the perfect package for my sexually desired migrant worker. But he comes with a few restrictions: He doesn't do anything orally on me. He only wants me to do it on him, in which I am perfectly obliged to do so. His hard and firm and hint of sweat scented cock in my mouth drove me crazy. But when it came to the deed, he failed badly. He cum fairly quick. Not to mention that he was inexperienced in sex. In my mind, I have crossed him off my list.

Few days after our first sex, he texted me telling me he missed me and wanting to meet again. I was reluctant. But I was horny. So I met him again. This time, I guided him slowly. He followed my lead. Entering inside of me with slower and much controlled pace. The sex lasted slightly longer than the last time. He felt happy about it.

Since then, we met every week at lunch time when he was on his lunch break and returned home from work to have sex with me.

I queried him if he has ever fucked a man. He told me that he did with a guy before me. Met him from tiktok. A local chinese guy. From there leading to physical meet up and sex. It lasted a few months before he left the country for work, till he met me. I was his 2nd. 

In every session, he has gotten from being touch aversion to more intimate in caressing my body and, his personal favorite, my white smooth ass. Although he doesn't like to do thing with his mouth, I love giving him kisses on his chest, neck, and shoulder, whenever we hug each other upon meet up or after sex as a sign of affection. I guess he doesn't mind me doing that to him since he told me he really like me and me doing that to him.  

Somehow he has the habit of disappearing for a few months without text messages and come back as if nothing has happened. I was upset but I didn't query further. Every few months he disappears and comes back, he is surprised by my physique - from lean to bulk. Of course, my juicy ass is what he loves the most. He can't stop touching my ass and telling me "your ass is big I love it".

His act of disappearing is quite frequent to the point I got really upset and cut contact with him completely. Blocked him even for a few months. Only to have him unblocked later. He texted me again the beginning of this year. Consistently every week for meet up. But I ignored every text of his. This lasted for 4 months. His persistent efforts of not giving up on me is what got me caved in eventually.

When we finally met up, he was upset and asking why I ignored him. I didn't say a word but kneel down in front of him, pulled his pants down, and gulped his already rock-hard cock in my mouth. I was relief that he was still excited to see me as ever. The sex at that time somehow felt different from the previous encounters we've had. It felt intimate, loving, and yearning. He started to hold my hands as he was inside of me. His face inches apart from my shoulders. I can tell he was completely at ease at what he does.

His act of disappearing got my curiosity, I confronted him about it. He said that despite he works nearby where we stay, often he would be relocated to some remote place for work for a few months. This is why he went missing.

"I really like you. And I really miss you. I want to see you. Why would I block you?" He said.

Since then, I have no reason to give him the benefits of doubts. I believe what he said. I mean, if he doesn't like me, he would have given up on me long time ago.

I don't love him. But I do like Krim a lot. He is the only pakistanis guy who appreciates having good time and doesn't take me for granted.

He can host. We both stay very close to each other, and always available at the right timing. I love big cock and he loves my toned ass. Although the sex doesn't last long, at least a quickie sex before work is what we both needed in the times like this.

We have the right place, are at the right time, and are right person for each other.

What more could I ask for? 

Decision Made

Dear Zach,

In my previous post, I've mentioned about the notion of partaking Spanish course and listed out a series of doubts. I am very grateful that some of you are very encouraging for me to go for it if I am genuinely interested in it.

Having said that, I have also consulted Gemini (Google's version of chatgpt) and vented my concerns and doubts.

Here's what Gemini told me:

When you are feeling stuck, your instinct is to add something new to your resume to stand out. It's a proactive thought, but we need to look at how the Malaysian job market actually treats languages. If you are learning Spanish strictly to solve a financial strain and get a job in KL, the math does not add up.

In Kuala Lumpur, the high-paying language allowances are almost exclusively for corporate roles requiring Mandarin, Japanese, Korean, or Vietnamese because our economic trade is deeply tied to Asia Pacific. While there are a few corporate Spanish roles in KL servicing the Latin American markets, they are rare, and companies often hire native expats or native-level speakers who lived abroad.

Takes 2+ years, costs RM 1,150+ upfront per level, and has almost zero market demand from employers in Kuala Lumpur.

You have to be completely fluent—usually at a B2 or C1 level on the CEFR scale.

• To get to that level from zero, it takes roughly 600 to 800 hours of intense study.

• If you do it via a 30-hour classroom term every few months, it will take you years to get to a employable level. You need a financial solution much faster than that.

Therefore, I have decided not to go for it. My initial thought of taking Spanish course was just to slightly brush up my resume and skill. Somehow an AI clarifies my doubts, knowing that Spanish class is just a luxury hobby if you have the disposable money.

  

To enroll or not to enroll

Dear Zach,

I have been self-learning Spanish over the past 2 years and, so far, I've managed to understand the context of the conversation in the netflix shows I watched. But I am nowhere near being fluent in speaking the language because I have no one to speak with. I've always wanted to further improve learning the language itself. 

Chatgpt suggested me to take up a structured Spanish language course offered by the Spain Embassy in Malaysia. I've looked it up and it has several intake on every 3 months. Two weeks ago, I've inquired with them about the details and was told that the next intake for absolute beginner will be on mid of next month. The beginner Spanish course is segregated into 3 levels - from 1.1 to 1.3. The price for each level is RM950 for 10 weeks, the session will be conducted in face2face for 3 hours on Saturday.

Few days ago, I got an update about the opening registration for the new intake. Unfortunately, the timing for the class is not in my favor. I asked if I could jump into 1.2 level instead as I told them I have been self-learning for a year and the timing for that particular level is right for me. They allow it as long as I still have the basics.

The dilemma: Do I really need it? Why do I need to spend such amount to learn the language when I can learn it myself with all the free resources on the internet? Will I get a good return if I invest in this course? Will I travel to Spain for work? Will I ever get a Spanish boyfriend? Will I ever travel to Spain? Is this language gonna open door for me? Is this language important for me?

Sex = Money

Dear Zach,

I came across a post on the gay forum where this user posted about having sex is expensive.

Gay apps now cost money,

 

OnlyFans cost money, 

 

PrEP, PEP, monekeypox and other vaccines cost money,

 

paid fun cost money, 

 

find a room cost money, 

 

go gay sauna cost money, 

 

travel cost money, 

 

every fucking shit cost money,

 

sex = money 

 

money = sex 

 

What he vented about is an absolute truth. Having sex is no longer a free thing anymore unlike back in the days when guys could just lay back and stick their dick into any kind of hole for pleasure. The only concern for the heteros was getting their female partner knocked up. Other than that, having sex is practically stress free and easy.

Fast forward today, having sex is equivalent to spending money. Buying condoms of different sizes and brand, type of lubricants used for smooth penetration, figuring out the places to host for sex, etc. All added up it become a cost to bare. Not to mention if you are a frequent raw sex player, taking PreP is mandatory in this case, and frequent STD testing that cost over RM300, just to make sure you are clean to proceed to having sex at your own mean.

Since when having sex has become a financial burden for everyone? It is no wonder why most of the lower class gay guys are succumbed to STD and HIV fairly easy when they don't have the financial mean to purchase the basic necessary protections for themselves.

There are many times I want to have sex, but the only place I could have sex is going to gay sauna. It means I have to pay RM30 for entry, and consume a few pills of PreP that cost RM10 to get protection for myself. If I were to go every weekend, it would sum up RM120 per month! 

Who to blame? Is having sex becoming a luxury or is it not a basic psychological need anymore?

.

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Oh by the way, grindr and other gay hook ups apps are officially removed from google play store.  

  

Open Shower Play

Dear Zach,

Last evening, I went to Chakran after a month of not having sex. I was extremely horny I literally jerked off every night in the shower before sleep. I wanted to get my monthly massage session fixed but my wallet is running tight. So I decided to go to Chakran instead.

I arrived at 7pm - not much of a crowd. It made sense because it was on the weekday. Ten minutes in the dry sauna, I was already making out and sucking cock of one indian guy. I proceed to the steambath room and let some hungry suckers savoring my cock. But the most happening times for me were at the open shower area, where I got to quick swallow a big-dick indian, and got raw fucked by this tall bald indian daddy top.

I walked out of the steambath room naked as I passed by this mature daddy. Then, he followed me to the open shower as I tried to cool myself down with the chilling water cascading from the shower. He stood next to my shower, gently placed his hand on my erogenous zones and reached over my left to grab the publicly shared shower gel. I playfully grab his thick cock as he reached over. He squirted a few drops of the shower gel, lathering on his stocky body as he got closer to my back, and slid his hands across my back to my chest, lathering his soapy hands from my chest to my orifice. Before I knew it, he was poking his dick against my orifice, knowing what was coming next. He was trying to find a hidden lube at the top of the rusty pipe, but the lube is not slippery enough to penetrate me, so I used a bit of the shower gel instead to lube his dick up, and he slid inside me smoothly.

There were a few indian guys walked in on us were surprised by the sight of us fucking openly. But it was dark but they could make out the silhouettes of one big indian guy humping a pale chinese bottom at the corner of the shower room. Some of them stood aimlessly under the shower just to watch us. He finished outside of my ass. He thanked me and took a shower and left. 

I continued cruising around in the steambath room to have a great foreplay before I left at 9pm.