Toxic Drivers

Dear Zach,

I have joined a delivery driver group community in FB and I have read a lot of experiences and encounters of others on how they overcome and diffuse the situation when shits hit the fan. Also, some interesting event unfold during the delivery process being shared so that other drivers can take notice. But, mainly, the group is just a bunch of whiny, angry, and low EQ drivers spreading their toxic negativity faith to others because of the low fare for drivers, complaints from customers, and undeniably injustice from the customer service to the drivers.

These kind of posts I would try my best to avoid reading it. Somehow, I can't stop myself but to read and understand the frustration and despair on what they are going through. The comments from other drivers don't really help much but to add more oil to the blazing fire itself, trying to justify their wrong to right just because they are unhappy with everything and everyone but themselves.

The more I read, the more I am influenced by them in terms of thought, mindset, and action. Like I am constantly angry - angry about over nothing. Like I always assume things happened to these drivers would someday happen to me. Like I always needed to raise up my shield against them when it happened. Despite I work 3 hours a day in the afternoon, my mind is fried from thinking all the possible forms of spiteful events if I deliver the goods late to the customers. 

Ever since I started to combine a few orders in one way delivery, the expected time to delivery has become slightly longer than usual. What was used to be 5 stars service now has drop to 4.97. I am no longer getting any review for my service. All that has ceased since I learnt how to combine orders and send in one shot. 

What can I do? The fare is bad and low, the only way to recoup is to grab a few orders combined and make the best out of it. Somehow this method has allowed me to go home much earlier, in which I have nothing to complain about.

I am not sure if the influence has anything to do with my frequent lash out at my dad or my dad has been very petulant with himself. His hearing is getting worst therefore I would raise my voice at him and lashing out my excess frustration simultaneously.    

This has been said for the umpteenth times - social media is extremely bad influence. I think it is time to avoid that group for a while now. 

33

Dear Zach,

I wrote a short blog about my 23 y.o birthday 10 years ago. Somehow this post popped up at my popular post section at the sidebar and it was hard to miss. Thought of writing a post about my 33 y.o birthday.

It was unbelievable that I have lived for 10 years since. A lot could and had happened within the past 10 years. A lot of significant events happened in my life that literally changed the entire course of my life upside down - the good and bad way. But I regret nothing to everything I did and I would probably still do it if I were to given a second chance rewind.

I never celebrated my birthday every year. I always treated it as a normal day of life. This year was no different than others - apart from the fact that my mum was no longer here with me and my dad for a simple dinner on the day before my birthday.

Not sure which year it started, on every birthday, I would always cry in my car on the way back home from gym. The year before last, I cried because I was at lost in my career prospect, feeling pretty useless; Last year, I cried because knowing my mum was gonna died; This year, I didn't cry - I had cried enough. But I was just sad and lonely because I am still at lost in my career prospect. Now I come to think of it, how did I actually make it so far since back then when I was already jobless and clueless at my life goal? When there is a will, God gives you a way.

I spend my birthday this year at home, sleeping through day and night because I was strangely tired. Woke up in the morning, doing chores, and cooking my weekly dessert soup for the serving of two, me and my dad. I wanted to have a birthday sex. But I ended up staying in, jerking off in the shower at night, and hit the sack at 11pm.

Gay Hitchhiker

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Bimarried man finally gave in to my blowjob request

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Spending on dumb shit

Dear Zach,

I am neither a big spender nor spending on unnecessary thing that absolutely bring no benefits to me. I have always been living in frugal, except when comes to my fitness and health aspect, I am willing to spend more on that. It is part of an essential aspect of life to live better for years to come. I wouldn't like spending on garments or shoes or anything. If I were to come to the state where I needed to spend on these things, I would choose the most affordable or the cheapest one as long as it does it job well.

I don't know what comes over me last few days. I feel like a switch inside of me flipped. I decide to start a collection of "Trading Card Game" of a specific genre - think about Pokemon Cards but it is not pokemon card but something else similar. I want to own a collection I love about. Rather than buying its toys in which it holds no value in future, I've bought their card collection instead. I go to Shopee and start browsing for affordable price packs to check out.

Two days later, they arrived to me in small boxes of plentiful packs of cards inside. I am so stoked because I just am. I start cutting off the top of every packs and shuffle the cards, trying to pull the rare cards out of dozens. I don't want to think so much about it. I just want to enjoy the moment being a child again. I've gotten a good amount of pulls in getting rare cards. I love everything about it. I carefully slide them one by one into the card album in neat and perfect order. After I am done, I move away and take a good look of the collection I got so far. I love it!

This is the best RM800 splurge I've spent! Not even a seep of regret come to my mind.

In the end, I just want to start something that I enjoy. 

Probably I am just lonely. but whatever.      

A jinx or a curse

Dear Zach,

Seven years ago, when I bought my first car, I was working as freelancer. My income wasn't stabilized at that time. Since it was a brand new car, I decided to work as e-hailing driver to supplement my income since the registration at that time was smooth sailing without much requirements - all you need is a valid driver license, identity card, and car grant. I set up the driver's account within a day. The next day, I started driving and picking up passengers. Fast forward one month later, the government decided to introduce a new policy whereby all the drivers must comply to mandatory car-inspection, obtaining e-hailing driver's license, and purchasing an add-on insurance for e-hailing. I was pretty upset at the news because I just started out and here came a bunch of burdening regulation we would have to comply. The regulation was enforced 2 month later after the news announced. I have already quit by then.

Now, I have started working as a delivery driver 2 months ago. Again, all was well, I was pretty contented, until the war broke out, oil price surged, which in turn rendering all the price of petrol in the world shot up double amount as before. Although the government has subsidized almost 50% of the price with a fixated amount of 300L per month for each of us 2 months ago, this month they decided to make a u-turn and reduced the amount to 200L per month because they can. As a delivery driver myself, even though I work only for a few hours, 200L per month is literally not enough.

My car feeds on 20L of petrol per pump at the price of RM40 (unsubsidized price for now = RM80). I would need 10 pumps to fulfil the quota. Therefore, I need to carefully plan for my trips for delivery so that I can make it last for at least 3 days before next pump. I am not so much worried about my earning now, I am more concerned about the gas price directly inflicting my earning.

You see, whenever I start to feel comfortable working on something, an unpleasant event would come along right after, as if it is waiting for me and snatch away my happiness. Am I jinx or what? 

     

Greeting in Undie

Dear Zach,

This afternoon, I've accepted a job to deliver a few boxes of alcohol to a rich neighborhood in Bangsar (a.k.a the beverly hills) where I have to drive into small tiny road and hills and turning sharp cornering. It is nice to explore some part of neighborhood in KL I've never gotten the chance to do so.

After 30 minutes, I've arrived an area where it shaped like a cul-de-sac - all these fancy big houses at the middle, small modern houses at the side along the round shape. I circled to the back and reached at the customer's drop off point. I was told at the pick-up point that the customer is an expat - not suprising because this place is where most of the expat would live in.

When I arrived at his gate, the expat greeted me in his boxer. Literally a very short boxer. Fortunately, he was wearing a shirt but that itself didn't do much of covering, partly due to his tallness in which it makes him look like he was wearing a brief. I have to admit he has a great ass. As he came closer to help me out to unload,  I took a quick look of his feature - he was bald with nose and ear piercing, a small moustache above his lips, he looked a mix of arab and white. And he was definitely gay. Who in the hell would someone greet a delivery rider in a boxer? I am not sure how these expat live and greet people, but this surely isn't the way our local greet a stranger. lol.

After finished unloading, I quickly left for another job before the traffic started building up.

Cont. Dying Friendship

Dear Zach,

A continuation of the "dying friendship" post I wrote last month. After 2 weeks, he decided to text me again - asking if I want to come over to his place (for sex). 

I did not reply him yet because I was in the hurry to get ready for work. 

I guess he is out of bottom to choose or he has fucked every bottom he could in his area, therefore I am his last option to booty call.

What do you think I should reply with? Because I am planning to say "no" to going down to his place due to traffic reason.