Giving Up

Dear Zach,

I am giving my fitness career.

I have had enough of the stagnant progress in my career and all I see in my working circle is getting smaller and most of my co-workers are jumping out from this fitness career before it is too late.

I spent 10 grands in courses in the hope of getting an attractive salary package. I was dead wrong. I wasn't paid up on par of my credentials. I was paid even less than it should have been. Cut it short, I was a fool for spending so much in myself in turn I got nothing back.

People in Malaysia are mostly obese and not willing to pay for trainers to train them. Tbh, everything is on Youtube and who really needs a trainer?

I guess it is not too late to change my career.

Lost

Dear Zach,

I have been jobless for a month now. Apart from doing outcall massage and swimming coaching for active income, I have no channel else to generate anymore income.

I have looked through Youtube for ideas on how to create my own startup business. I did a small crafting on my own; Turned out it was a mess. I was fascinated by apparel business; everyone is doing it now and it would render me competitively disadvantage. I searched over the internet for ideas. It just didn't occur to me.

Since I am jobless and financially tight, I spent my time at home only.

It probably gonna be a long months to come. 

Massage and Sex

Dear Zach,

He has been messaging me through instagram for quite some time, asking about training and stuff. At first, I was reluctant.

But as time went by, we chatted and both of us shown a bit of interest in each other.

He is typical malay with the typical look. Which I fancy a lot.

Recently, he sort of bugging me again. This time I tried my luck telling him that I was doing outcall massage service. He showed sign of interest.

We decided to meet in a hotel I previous did massage for. He came and picked me up.

He looks surprisingly smart in real person.

When we settled in the hotel, we both stripped naked. Him laying on the bed on his stomach.

His skin is smooth which i fancy a lot. Typical brown malay skin tone.

I was constantly hard-on when I massaged his body. Of course, his hands was constantly playing with my anus.

When we done with the massage, I made a move by sucking his 5 inches dick. Wet and slippery.

He slowly moved to passionate make out, and intense rimming.

I can't recall when was the last I got rimmed so good. He is a natural good rimmer and I enjoyed it getting rimmed so much.

He fucked me so bad. Probably that's what he wanting to do so long since we made exchange in Instagram. And I told him to go harder.

We both cummed together. He said if he want to have massage again, he will definitely find me.

My First Experience As A Massage Boy

Dear Zach,

It was called a low class job but I did it regardless. It was a rather quick money to get.

I posted an ad of myself on forum. The next day I was asked if I ever offered outcall massage.

I debated whether I should ignore him. Being jobless and aimless for my life now, I decided to reply with my offer.

He gladly accepted it and we met in a hotel. Truthfully, I wasn't nervous at all. Mainly because I need money.

I was greeted with a knock moment later from a 40 year old ish Indian man. We settled down ourselves with small talk.

Moment later, we were butt-naked and he settled himself on his stomach on the bed. Slowly, I showcased my massage skill that I learnt from the Youtube 2 hours ago.

Thank God, he preferred gentle massage. So I didn't have to really apply too much pressure.

I spent good ol' 50 minutes massaging him and being molested. And he was nice.

His dick is typically uncut. Which mean you couldn't pull the foreskin down. I tried to pull down, but it seemed "glued" inside. Kinda disgusting but I got over it.

I jerked him off and got it done.

And I was paid as according to the deal we made.

I accepted it without any sense of shame or regret.

Funnily, I am satisfied with myself for making my first earning by myself.

Jobless Syndrome

Dear Zach,

I am, again, finding myself falling into one of these jobless syndrome.

What does it actually mean? It is when you are jobless and having nothing else to do besides being jobless; upset because you are not working; thinking about what went wrong; complaining to the air that life treated me unfair all the time; complaining to the air that people at the old workplace sucks and they are so low level thinking that I was better than them; irritated easily over small issue; thinking about my validation instead of my qualification; emotional at night thinking about being jobless all over again; cry.

I am soon to be jobless actually. I don't know whether I should be crying or laughing. What have I done to my previous life?

Knowing that I will be jobless soon. I am bringing my scowl face all the time to workplace. People start keeping me a distance which I don't actually care. I feel like they are ganging up against me. I feel like the world is against me. Period.

I don't know what else I should do next anymore. Probably be a male escort?

Passive Sex Is A No No

Dear Zach,

This malay lad has been knocking on my grindr inbox for quite sometimes. He was either staying in a hotel where it is too far away or a place where the traffic is forever congested. I declined travelling to his place.

Last Saturday, he messaged me again.

"Getting anyone to fuck you today?", he wrote.

"Ya." I said.

He was willing to travel to my place nearby and get a hotel room for 2 hour sex. I agreed then we met at night. I suggested the hotel which is very nearby to my home and it costs RM30 for 2 hours. He didn't mind paying since he can claim back.

I met him in the room and he looked typical Malay - slim, brown, and average height. Before I could even settle down he made a move from my back and started caressing my chest underneath my shirt. And his 6 inches dick got hard instantly. He proudly grabbed his junk with his pants on showing me how huge his dick is. I tasted bigger than that honestly. I didn't say it out.

We removed our shirt and started making out fiercely. I sucked him ferociously because it tasted great. He seems so proud of his junk and laid against the wall looking at me dominantly. I hated that look.

He even asked me to roll the condom on him. And pretty much you can imagine the whole sex. He was being quite passive. Me basically spending all the time sitting on him humping on his dick. I didn't like it even though it fits my ass perfectly. He loved it how I humped his dick hard when there were people walking by outside our room. I purposely did that. "Shhhhh. Calm down! They could hear." I can see that he enjoyed when I did that - telling the world we are having gay sex.

We did doggy. Missionary. He stopped half way because his dick couldn't get hard enough. Quite disappointing. In the end, we didn't cum. I didn't plan to cum for him. So we laid on bed, briefly getting to know each other. Though I don't pretty much like him. I was kinda being straighforward to everything he asked. I didn't care if he likes it.

In the end, we made out again in the room when we about to leave. Both of us got hard again, him wanting to fuck me again. The thought was tempting. But I didn't want to have a passive sex again. So i bend over and gave one final deep suck on his dick and I said "next time".
 

Email Changed!

Dear Zach,

My previous email was used for almost 8 years since and recently I found that it's quite a mess when your discreet blog email is using the same one with your personal one. I have 5 emails now and it's quite a hassle to manage one by one. Because of that I decided to remove the old one and using dearzachblog@gmail.com as the primary contact.

Well, a change have to come. That old previous email has been abused with many dirty stuff I did over the past years. lol.

I have a lot of thing to share. I don't know where to start. There were times I planned to close this blog. But thinking it has been here for its existence for many people out there, I decided to leave it here.

To be honest, not much people read blogs these days. I doubt only a handful of reader out there. People would rather have a picture to follow than reading boring words on site to understand.

And thanks to those who email me whether i am still alive. I still am. I still having sex.

25

Dear Zach,

After living 25 years as human being, I've got to know that people are scary as fuck. People are culprit of hatred and disappointment. I don't have to live 50 years to realize that.

Turning 25 is nothing new to me except the fact that I was another year older with the prospect of losing my job yet again. Right after my birthday the next day, I dove into a heated argument with my superior about my remuneration. When comes to this sensitive issue, I have no tolerance to anyone albeit he's my boss. I worked hard for this new workplace although I was paid lesser than my previous workplace did. I did not complain. I was told that my special allowance was subject to change under management discretion. For fuck sake, I wasn't told a thing about this before I signed. Accusation thrown across the room between the two of us. I was so upset and disappointed. I was already paid less, am I that undervalued for my skills and qualification?

This was the second time I've been through such situation in my previous workplace. I am in despair. 

I am planning to quit working under people and work for my own. I am sick of these conflict of interest bullshit. I have nothing to lose but my own integrity.

25 is probably another worst year yet.