Bad Sex ; Great Sex ; Awaited Sex

Dear Zach,

I was in the mood to get railed so hard these days simply because of everything happening with me - my mum, the cancer, the stress, the hopeless future, my fitness bulking process, constant working out in the gym, the canker sore inside my gum killing me, and etc.

I was supposed to meet this new regular, whom I have met twice and the sex was amazing and he is an indian, few nights ago, but he did not reply my message until I have found another top whom I met in the gay sauna twice and we had light fun there and he is a Malay which I strictly don't prefer. Well, I met this Malay top in the sauna before I swore off meeting up with malay man, so technically speaking, I am not going against my integrity. Sound silly I know lol. Probably you may think this is unjustifiable. Anyway, he was on the way back home and he messaged me on whatsapp,

"did you just block me on grindr?" he wrote.

"huh? no." I replied.

"cause your profile pic was blank."

"probably I just changed to a new pic. thats why."

"ok. wanna meet up?"

I was horny and awaiting for my new regular top to reply but to no avail. So I invited him over since we both had some fun in the sauna and it was great. Somehow, the sex was underwhelming as fuck. It was just that the chemistry was off and he was trying so hard to pretend a Dominant but kinda failed. I felt like we were not as enthusiastic as we were before in the sauna. Also, there were some icks of him have made me turn off. I sent him off at the door when we finished and he texted me "thank you.". I wished him safe drive and good night and delete his conversation off my chat list. 

The next night, I invited the new regular top. We had a great time. He fucked me 3 times, and made out at the front door before he left.

I woke up the next morning thoroughly fucked. 

Thought of getting another indian top tonight whom I chated with 2 days ago as we both were interested to meet for sex. But alas, he has to work night shift, so we might meet tomorrow or the night after tomorrow.